"RANTS" Archive

What's Wrong with Nice Guys?

The Manipulator Files
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A Heartless Bitch Rant about Self-abusive People

(Filled with Bitchy Superlatives. Deal with it.)

I've no time or patience anymore for people who continually inflict pain on themselves in the form of abusive relationships or never-ending job difficulties, and then go looking for a sympathetic ear.

These people will accept NO responsibility for the predicaments they get themselves into, and they expend little or no REAL effort to solve their own problems. They either want YOU to solve them, or they want you to suggest alternatives so they can shoot them down for a variety of LAME reasons. And when you get frustrated with them, they tell you that you "just don't understand".

GAG. I understand all too well.

I can't tolerate people who rewrite history everytime they break up with someone. Like the woman who gets into a relationship, waxes effusively about how lovey-dovey-blissful things are, until object of her affections turns out to have different goals. (ie. he doesn't want to get married and have kids and she does). All of a sudden this prince falls off his pedestal, to become a "user" a "bastard" and numerous other nasty things. Never mind that he never said a nasty word to her, and was always attentive and charming. Everything the couple did together is now black and horrible. That wonderful romantic picnic he took her on, was dreadful - it rained and there were ants, and the salmon mousse was bad, and she had suggested the idea to him in the first place, so it wasn't like it was REALLY his idea....

You get the picture.

The worst of it, is that this type of person has a zillion "self-help" books on her shelves... Somebody ought to whap her over the head with one. It might do more good.

Get a grip! Don't go blaming the other guy and rewriting history every time someone doesn't live up to your expectations. And don't waste years of your life pursuing some guy (or gal!) expecting the person to change. Argh! Take responsibility for your actions and behavior! I'll let people disclaim responsibility for being involved with ONE lunatic, but after that, I figure a person plays an equal part in their relationships.

What REALLY gets me is people who assume I have "had it easy", just because I haven't made as many STUPID mistakes in my life. Hey, I've made mistakes. I just don't go around wailing about them, attempting to elevate my problems to martyr status. And I don't sit around wallowing in self-pity, using my tale of woe as some kind of pathetic attention-getting device.

My attitude is that if you are in difficulty, Shit or Get Off The Pot. Don't sit around moaning, expecting other people to solve your problems for you.

I don't want to hear about it. Life is too short to spend your time with boat anchors.

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